I've learned that in order for me to take care of myself, let go of judgment and find tolerance for all beings, I need to clear out my throat chakra regularly. This means that I speak my truth. And, by doing so, I cultivate ahimsa, which is non-violence. So please, mamas, allow me to roar my truth via the interwebs in order to avoid actually harming people in real life.
Remember-- I'm an authentic yogi--I've been using natural deodorant and drinking coconut water since 2004, so I obviously know what I'm talking about.
I invite you to chant "OM" after each bullet point on my list and offer up an intention of love.
List of Moms I Want To Smack:
• If you don't ever let your kids have fast food, I want to smack you.
• If you consider Panera Bread "fast food," I want to smack you.
• If you don't ever let your kids have sugar, I want to smack you.
• If you consider juice "sugar," I want to smack you.
• If you don't ever let your kids play with plastic, I want to smack you.
• If your legs didn't get fat when you were pregnant, I want to smack you. Actually, I want to punch you. In the jaw. And possibly give you a black eye.