"I'm sorry your kids treat you like shit sometimes. I'm sorry ALL of our kids treat us like shit sometimes. We really are so awesome, and it's frustrating that they can't see that and worship us."
A lot of mamas would (rightfully) look at this pee-filled, paint-covered, seat-up toilet and think, "That tiny asshole! When will he learn some potty etiquette already?"
But not me. I like to think of my potties as half full. Do you know what I thought when I stumbled across this scene? My wonderful boy! He WIPED!
When you spill agave a week ago and can't figure out where the actual mess went...until you get to your kids' new school to drop of registration forms. It's agave, bitches! So still a win, right? We're healthy. That's right, be impressed.
The fucking basics, mamas: these two things. And by no means do I have my shit together. Here is my current manicure:
And this is what I'm wearing right now:
But check out the selfie I took in the bathroom while my toddler was pooping and hurling library books at me:
Don't I look like one of moms who has her shit together? Okay, maybe not. But at the very least, I look presentable. Adorable, even. Definitely more "pulled together."
You, too, can take bathroom selfies that are Facebook and Instagram-worthy! It will take you LESS THAN 5 MINUTES to attain a much classier and more polished look.
We love our kids. They drive us crazy. We write about it instead of going insane.