For a moment, I stood there gathering my shopping bags under the fluorescent lights, mind racing to the incessant beep-beep-beep of the product scanners all around me, and I wondered: Am I giving preferential treatment to my son? Am I demanding demure, obedient behavior from my daughters and ruffling my son's messy hair whilst shrugging off his abysmal actions with the all too easy "boys will be boys" mentality?
Thankfully, I came to my senses and quickly remembered that my daughter had been just as belligerent, if not infinitely more so, at his age. And I hadn't sufficiently addressed her abhorrent behavior either. Phew! I wasn't setting the movement back; I was an equal opportunity overly lax mom. And you know what? I'm fine with that. Yes, I will always make choices that foster health, safety and ethics. And I will try for many other noble pursuits. But, my lord, three years old is quite possibly the single most magical age that exists. And I won't crush it by fighting about stuff that can wait. For at least a few months, I'm done trying to force Henry to:
- Eat vegetables, fruit, non-chicken-nugget meat, or anything that is not cheese or crackers
- Stop picking his nose
- Answer adults when spoken to in public
- Brush his teeth for longer than 20 seconds (and without spitting all over the faucet and/or in my face)
- Pee 100% inside the toilet
- Stop climbing every surface in our home
- Wear clothes
- Sleep in his own bed
- Wash himself in the bath (or keep more than 60% of the water inside the tub)
- Use an inside voice
- Understand why he can’t throw toys over the bannister from the second floor to the first
- Cease destroying the couches and risking grave personal injury by treating said couches like gymnastics equipment
- Use silverware
- Take cough medicine after being up all night coughing for a week
- Sit a minimum of four feet from the TV
- Do anything ever without a 1-2-3 warning
Disclaimer: The verdict is still out on whether or not my eight-year-old is becoming a decent human being, so take this post with a grain of salt.